Mamalicious!

Yep, she’s on a roll. This morning over breakfast:

“Mommy, do you have to go to college to be a princess?”

That’s proof positive of nature vs. nurture, right there. My feelings about the p-word are well-documented, and Princess Grace by Mary Hoffman (”There’s more than one way of being pretty.”) remains in heavy rotation here. Other than that, I hold my tongue, hold my breath, and trust the mama-wisdom of those who’ve told me that this too shall pass.

I also know that if I give this too much attention (”Why do you want to be a princess?” “Princesses are lame!”) BabyGirl will dig in her heels just to get a rise out of me. We did that dance a few times before I got wise to her wily little ways. She knows my buttons. But I’ve retired the pink frilly one, the food one, and the getting-dressed-in-the-morning-one (”You can either get dressed, on time, or I will take you to school in your pajamas, and let your teacher dress you in front of the class, in an outfit of my choosing.)–but I suspect she’s researching new buttons of mine all the time.

So, my answer to her this morning was very matter of fact. “Some princesses go to college. Some don’t. But colleges don’t teach people how to be princesses, if that’s what you’re asking.”

She waited, probably thinking another girl-power lecture was forthcoming. It was not. Instead she got, “Would you like more yogurt?”

Game, set, match: Mama.

Dave hands McCain and Palin their asses.

Conversation while en route to preschool this morning:

BabyGirl (age 4-almost-5): Mommy, Daddy is voting for Barack Obama, but he doesn’t even have a yard sign.

Me: Well, he can order one online.

BabyGirl: REALLY?  REALLY?  What dot com?

Me: BarackObama.com

BabyGirl: Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!  (starts doing a little victory dance in her car seat) BARACKOBAMA.COM! I’m going to tell him that tonight, and we can find it on the BIG computer!  I bet it’s on the big computer.

New blog alert! A cyber-buddy of mine recently launched his very own blog, Just One Black Man’s Opinion. In addition to both hailing from the Sunshine State South originally, JOBMO and I are both on a private e-list that’s been around since the early ’90s (I joined in 2004)–you know, a group of good folk you “meet” online, who you may or may not ever see in real life, and yet you’ve been together through births and deaths, marriages and divorces, hook-ups and break-ups, elections and economic collapses…?

Just who is JOBMO? Check out his intro:

I’m a “Forty Something” Black male, born and raised in the South. Politically, I consider myself a moderate-to-conservative Democrat. In my younger days, I was much more left of center than I am now. During my journey to my present place in the political spectrum, I became an Independent for a while but didn’t like it very much. I’m also a student of geopolitics and how events around the world affect our lives here in the US.

I came up with the name of my blog from a black commentator (who’s name escapes me) that my parents used to listen to. He would end each commentary with the statement; “This is just one black mans opinion”. For some reason that has always stayed with me through the years.

I am a battle hardened veteran of the old USENET newsgroup wars, where I regularly debated with people on the right as well as the left. At the moment, I prefer to not discuss my profession especially since I’m now putting my personal opinions on display in a very public forum. I’m just your average Brother; I’m a husband, father and all around nice guy that likes to dabble with computers, frequent Flea Markets and thrift stores looking for that one gem that everybody else has over looked. When I’m not traveling, I also sell stuff on eBay and Amazon, mainly for a little extra weekend beer money. I currently reside in Tampa, Florida and have no plans to live anywhere where the temperature drops below 40 degrees ever again.

What can you expect over at JOBMO’s? Here’s his preface to Tim Wise’s excellent piece, “Your Nation on White Privilege” (which JOBMO posts in its entirety here).:

Once again, Tim Wise knocks it out of the ball park. What really got me is how the situation with [Palin’s] 17 year old daughter’s pregnancy was dealt with by all the rightwing talking heads as well as the McCain campaign itself. I understand the fact that she is young and she made a mistake. And at this particular time in her life more than any other she needs her family’s support and understanding. I got that. The very same people that have basically made a living off of demonizing young unwed mothers (usually black) now suddenly have managed to find it in their hearts to have compassion and understanding. To me this is yet another example of right wing Republican hypocrisy. I’m neither surprised nor disappointed. After all I don’t expect better from these guys. What I am disappointed about is that nobody has called them out on this. Or maybe somebody has and I just missed it.

(JOBMO, regular folk have definitely called them on this, but the MSM (which is allegedly biased towards Dems, har) has given them a pass from what I can tell.)

Take some time to show JOBMO some blog-love today!

I have a question–no, not why McCain is scared to face His Royal O-ness in a debate.  It’s this:

Why is one of my cat trying to open my kitchen cabinets?

Seriously, I keep looking around for a hidden camera because clearly someone has slipped something into this cat’s kibble.  I have two corner (L-shaped) cabinets beneath the kitchen counter.  Neither contains food.  (Well, one contains the kitchen garbage can, but that’s always been there.)  In the past hour, I’ve shooed her away no less than four times.  With enough effort, she can actually pry the door open, but of course the scratching sound alerts me, and I usually get to her before she can get it open.  Earlier today, I had hauled her out of one of the cabinets–and had to wash all of my glass baking dishes because I found her lounging in my 9 x13.

Are the animals rising up?  Taking over the planet one kitchen cabinet at a time? What gives????

Back to work.

Monday, September 22, 2008
Please Respond Immediately Forthwith In Confidence

Minister of Treasury Paulson

Just read that the good folks at Bitch (”the feminist response to pop culture”) are in need of support of a monetary sort. They write:

First the bad news: The print publishing industry as a whole is staring into a void. Across the board, newsstand magazine sales are in a slump, subscriber numbers are down, and paper and postal costs continue to rise. But it’s not magazines like US Weekly or Vogue that you’ll see disappearing from the newsstands—they have the parent companies and the resources to weather industry ill winds. It’s the small, independent magazines like Bitch that will disappear, because the odds are already stacked high against us. And simply put: We need to raise $40,000 by October 15th in order to print the next issue of Bitch.

Now the good news: While it’s true that $40,000 is a lot of money, we know the number of you Bitch supporters is in the hundreds of thousands. And we’re asking each of you who values independent, nonprofit media and intelligent feminist cultural analysis to contribute what you can to ensure that Bitch thrives. And while we can’t say what form Bitch will take in the future (our direction will depend, in part, on your feedback), we can say that we’ve been hard at work to find an innovative publishing model that will allow us to maintain the spirit and integrity of Bitch while also reflecting the changing world around us.

As a nonprofit, reader-funded media organization, our fate really is—and always will be—in your hands. We don’t need a parent company. We just need you!

::: Please help us continue this important work by donating and sharing this message :::

…so lend them a hand, if you can!

Just before TechBoo and I took off for a weekend getaway to Miami (heavenly!) this past Friday, I learned that Mamalicious! has been awarded a Certified Honest Blogger Award! AJ aka The Cruel Secretary is the wonderful soul who likes me…she really likes me! (Check out my certification on the sidebar…Thanks, TechBoo! Mwah!)

According to Lisa from Black Women Blow the Trumpet (who bestowed the Award upon AJ), Certified Honest Bloggers are “transparent and authentic in their writings.” She adds, “I believe that writers who consistently bring honesty to their work should be recognized because it is a rare virtue, and it requires tremendous courage.”

I share this award with nine other bloggers whom AJ also feels have “big, honest brains and hearts.” They are:

K-Spot

Mariko Passion

Bianca Laureano

Make Fetch Happen

Possumstew

The Bus Bench

Bold as Love

African.Dance.Drum.Life!

Anovelista

With the exception of the always on point Make Fetch Happen, I’m not familiar with my fellow awardees, but I look forward to reading them.

Part of receiving this award is passing it on, per the following rules:

1. When you receive the award, you must write a post showing it, including the name of the blog that has presented you with the award and providing a link to that blog.

2. Choose a minimum of seven blogs that you feel are brilliant in their concept or design.

3. Show their names and links and leave them a comment informing them that were recognized with this award.

4. Optional- Show a picture of those who awarded you and those you give the prize to.

5. Pass it on!

Alrighty then…

For being the genuine article (literally and figuratively), for writing from the heart sans the schmaltz, and for their good humor and good intellect…I bestow the Certified Honest Blogger Award upon the following good people:

The Champ at VerySmartBrothas

A real-life friend, who really, really, really needs to finish his book.

Jen at JenX67

Jen’s writing just grabs you and puts you in whatever mood she wants to set for that moment: nostalgic, humorous, soul-searching…

Christina at Christina Springer

Christina’s poetry, which permeates all of her writing, slays me. Especially when she writes about mothers. And children. And bygone eras.

Rachel at Single Mom Seeking

Rachel used to be my editor at LiteraryMama, but now she’s my Single Mama Hero! She’s truly straight no chaser, telling her stories even at the risk of judgment from others.

Dawn at This Woman’s Work

Sometimes I wonder if Dawn sleeps. She’s a freelancer, business owner, mom of 2, and an advocate and resource for adoptive families, particular those with open adoptions. And she still finds time to blog regularly and handle her critics with aplomb.

Genie at Through the Fears

Genie is my dear, dear real-life friend. We’ve weathered so many personal storms together, and she is one of the most honest people I know. She’s a visual artist, but I really wish she would write more.

Tami at What Tami Said

I once called Tami the blogger I want to be when I grow up. Not only is she a fantastic writer, but a person of conscience to boot. Her political and cultural analyses are always refreshing, personal, and challenging.

Big Man at Raving Black Lunatic

Don’t let the name of the blog fool you: there’s no crazy ranting going on over at Big Man’s blog. What you will find though is insightful, well-written commentary on the issues of the day, and maybe some solid riffs on fatherhood and religion thrown in for good measure.

(There’s one person to whom I would have given this award, but I won’t contribute to her procrastination and interrupt her productive flow with the “pass it on” requirements. But she know I lurves her anyway.)

Many, many thanks to AJ and congratulations to all awardees!

I ripped the title of this entry from an entry that Yvette posted recently with clips from HBO’s “The BlackList Vol. 1″. The first clip is of Chris Rock:

I shared this clip today with someone I love, noting that she’s Larry Holmes and her parents are the racist judges. My friend is totally kicking ass in her work and in overcoming various obstacles–but her parents, in what they say and don’t say, do and don’t do, insist on declaring her a loser. The lens through which they look at her life is the opposite of rose-colored. My friend can reject their view of her world, or subject herself to it and truly lose the fight.

I say this as someone who has been there. I’ve felt hurt and defeated by what I’ve seen when I’ve looked at myself through other people’s lens. On the flip side, however, there have been times when people who love me have had a much more charitable view of me than I’ve had of myself. Ultimately, I’ve come to craft a lens through which I view my life such that it is charitable enough, but also objective enough to keep me grounded, focused, and content. (um, most of the time)

Chris Rock’s metaphor also tells us that in order for us not to “let it go to the judges”, we have to manage a knock-out punch. I thought about what that means outside of the boxing ring. It can mean healing from a painful past, defying personal odds, breaking cycles of family dysfunction–I’m doing that. It can also mean committing to a path that is uncertain, personally or professionally–I’m doing that too. And having, by God’s grace, walked such a walk, I can’t imagine letting someone arbitrarily declare me a loser. Well, it can be declared, but I won’t own it. I am tremendously blessed, despite my losses, and I’ve got too much going to leave it to chance–or to someone else’s biases, fears, or insecurities. This is where the boxing metaphor falls apart…if his match had gone to the judges, Larry Holmes would have had to live by their decision (wait–can you appeal in boxing?). But in real life, the judges have only as much authority as we allow them to have.

So to my friend, whom I love, you can’t let it go to the judges. You’ve come too far for that.

Michelle at GirlChildPress is playing with my emotions.  In case you don’t know Michelle, she’s the editor-brain, -heart, and -soul behind Just Like a Girl: A Manifesta! [1] and Growing Up Girl: An Anthology of Voices from Marginalized Spaces.  She’s playing with my emotions because on her home page is this little teaser:

Woman’s Work: The Short Stories
Call for submissions coming in November 2008

That’s it.  Nothing else until November.  Yes, I was just complaining about lots of projects and being undisciplined, but this one makes me drool.  Oh, the possibilities!

(And speaking of woman’s work, this coming winter I’ve been invited to speak on that very subject at St. Lawrence University’s Center for Diversity and Social Justice.  Apparently, some one there caught my Bitch article and thought I might have a few words on the subject.  I’ll speak to some classes and then again later in the evening. )

So, keep an eye on GirlChildPress.  I will!

[1]Yours truly has a short story, “Bomani Jones”, in Just Like a Girl, and on November 1st, I’ll be joining Michelle and hopefully other JLAG contributors for a reading at Busboys and Poets in D.C.  More excitement!

Multi-tasking stats: This entry was composed while I made a yummy dinner of salmon with lemon-ginger butter (homemade!), jasmine rice, spinach and mushroom sautee for me, and green beans and carrots for the little people.  Hungry?